by Sufficiency
This currency of mine
it will lift you
like a house hung from a balloon
or a wife off her feet by her husband
This urgency of time
let it pass you
like the drive in a car to vacation
like angst before returning home
This destination is a comma
in the adventure
where nothing is left behind
as moments move us toward what’s whole
The past may have scratched
skipped the favorite part of your song
though it’s been pardoned in your present
buffered into tomorrow
and now your flawless to me
you’ve become my lens of love
as I’ve become your trade
My ambition is to be spent for you
My ambition is to be sent by you
to the store for groceries
to your room to fetch you something
to aid the family
to the earth until its end or my own
My yearning is to be mercy in your hand
My yearning is to glow in your eyes
to be a trust in generosity
to be evocative of Love
to be an advocate of you.
I give you my breath and my beat and my me
and I hope its enough.
I’m enough.
John 13:1-17: Love Cleans Up
The phrasing in verse 1 always moves me.
“Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end.”
Then, Jesus shocks the system. The Divine touches the lowest part of our existence, to wash off wherever the disciples feet have tread. It’s absurd, yet Jesus insists. In the middle of dinner, he stops to clean the dirty:
No holiday, no meal, no moment in my life compares to the gravity of this moment with Jesus and his disciples. Furthermore, in this moment, Jesus washes the feet of someone who already decided to betray Him and what’s more, He knew about it.
Jesus took his hands just prior to being pierced and washed the feet of the man who sold Him out. He washed the feet also of Peter who debated with Him about whether Jesus should wash His feet.
In verse 7 and 8 are more game changing verses.
“You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”
“No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.”
Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.”
I could write a book on verse 7 alone, but I’ll settle for a paragraph or two for now.
How many times have you wondered what God is doing and why you don’t understand?
There have been times and seasons when I did not realize what was going on then and have often pleaded with God for understanding. Because I didn’t understand, sometimes, to my detriment I have said to God, “do not touch me,” which was another way of saying “I don’t trust you to fix this.” A wounded dog fears greater pain.
But Jesus’ response in verse 8 puts the emphasis on His actions, not Peter’s understanding. To take part in this love, Jesus says, “allow me to do this.” Jesus is cleansing where they have been and even where they are going, which makes the thought of Judas’ betrayal so heart wrenching.
I’m cleansing your feet yet where your feet are about to take you will carry us both to our death. For Jesus there was a resurrection.
After washing their feet Jesus closes in verses 14-17 saying, “Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet… Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.”
Jesus often likes to end things with good promises. He likes us to be #blessed.
But what makes us blessed is the way in which we share ourselves. You will be blessed if you wash one another’s feet, you will be blessed if you give your time and intimacy to God and if you share love with others. You will be blessed if you offer the gospel to your enemy. I hope I find my blessing in being able to relinquish my self-serving for the sake of Jesus Christ my Savior.
This is my endeavor and this is why I can’t shake taking a step of faith in this season of life. Jesus cleansing and the grace he gives, makes me enough. It is my reminder in my next footstep.
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